25/07/08

Well a lovely early morning post - Will and Lizzie got up to sweet nothing in Wales, woo! However quite frankly I'm still annoyed that they went off on holiday without me, even if me and Will in each other's presence is unbearable. Yes that's right, they're no longer the 'Cool Clique', they're STREAK (which is an acronym of their real names)... oh how included that makes me feel. How much do I want to discuss the trip with them? Not that fucking much. Do I care if it was the best summer holiday ever? No i sodding well do not. And so the predicted rubbing it in my face has begun and i am ready to strike someone down.

Oh also rather annoyingly, I am always saying to Ruth that I feel inadequate compared to Will, and she's always like no if he were better than you I would be hanging out with him, not you. So she's just been on holiday with him and they're going to Exeter and Lancaster unis for little day trips to check out the unis (something that Ruth and I had done at York). Yes, that does make me feel crappy.

However I am somewhat floundering in my own swampish despair at the moment and I am sure that others, not just I, am tired of it. Yet I seem to have trouble arranging things with people - Ruth on coffee: talk to me after the weekend, Louisa on something this weekend: no reply, Alice on coffee: be right back a second..... still waiting for you to return Alice, it's been over a day! And I really, really want to ask Will to meet me (play pool?) but at the moment I am still in petrified state, so no.

Today (well yesterday, technically) I have had a sortout and general clean so now my room is shinier than it was and that has helped calm me somewhat. My biology book has arrived at the library (so I can swot up and get into Oxford) so I can also get that at some point. And Bert and Ernie, my two cotton plants, are developing slowly but nicely - Bert is having some wilting issues but I am coaching him through it. I do possess that special ability to become completely introverted and distract myself when no one wants me. Fantastic.